it's my party and i WILL cry

i know normally, i'm this big bundle of happiness. 

but today, i'm going to pout.  full on crying and whinning.  "why brittin"??? 

i'm going to mourn.  i will mourn what SHOULD have been.  i will mourn what never will be.

i'm going to complain.  complain about all the CRAP our family has been through this year.

i'm going to cry.  i will cry tears of denial and tears of acceptance.



and then...

i will rejoice.  rejoice in the assurance God gives us that everything WILL be okay.

i will be thankful.  i will be thankful for the health and restoration of each member of our family.

i will take comfort in the peace and love of my God and family.



****  not really in the mood to talk.... we've come to that point in brittin's life where we need to make careful decisions regarding her education.  we will pray faithfully and trust God's Will is going to happen.