confessions of a REAL mom

pinterest has us all JACKED.

confessions of a REAL mom:

1.  i don't like going on field trips with my children.

2.  i did not cry when any of them went to kindergarten.

3.  by the beginning of august, i yearn for school to start.

4.  i have cleaned the spaghetti stained high chair in the bathtub.

5.  i've had the kids have "sprinkler time" because i didn't want to clean them all up after spaghetti.

6.  i buy food i like and hide it.

7.  i buy frozen yogurt i like and they hate so i have a sliver of a chance of getting some.

8.  when my children tap on me to get my attention, i want to karate chop them.

9.  sometimes, i hide from my children.  they always find me.

10.  when my son had a gecko, i think i liked it as much as he did.

11.  places like Chuck E Cheese or McDonald's Play Place give me anxiety.  they are dirty and loud.

12.  i found a stray oatmeal cream pie in the pantry and hid it until i could sneak it to my room without the kids hearing the crinkle sound of the wrapper.  then i hid and ate it.

13.  i told one of my kids that candy was "vitamins" so they wouldn't want any of my candy.

14.  i think school cafeterias smell funny and avoid them at all costs.

15.  when my car is super gross and dirty, i just blame the kids.