a day in the life :)

being a super active family, we would normally be outside on a beautiful july night, but given that it's a BALMY 91 degrees here in northern indiana at 8:15... we decided to have a movie night in the AC!!!  as i sit here in the kitchen, i can't help but notice a few things:

our black lab skylar has now effectively taught our 11 week old cavalon, rudy how to 1) dig massive holes  2)  carry firewood all over the yard (he's all of five lbs!!)  3) chew on sticks (that can't be good for him) and on top of it... rudy is no longer white... he's dirt speckled!  guess who's getting a bath!

brittin, our seven year old inherited her big brother's old iphone tonight.  of course there's no service on it... but i haven't seen her more mesmerized for this long... ever!!  it's like a miracle!!! 

sireana and lexi went to the movie theater to watch the katy perry movie.  SO GLAD they didn't ask me to go!!

mike and brady are chilling watching a total "guy movie".  they are completely engrossed and i perfectly happy doing my thing in the kitchen.

our granddaughter azria came home tonight (from her dad's) smelling like she was dipped repeatedly in Taco Bell ground beef... and while i LOVE me some taco bell... it's not really a great scent on a two year old!

well... i have a dog bath to give... 

:)

the hardest part...

i clearly have TOO MUCH TIME on my hands during the day!!  so my mind is always going about 100 mph...

one thing that's really been on my heart lately... again... children and families in need, meaning children in foster care or with limited/supervised visitation with their children.  i have always had a heart for the children... but this week, i keep thinking about the parents.  obviously, i know if they don't have their children, there should be a legitimate reason.  what i keep thinking tho is HOW DO WE HELP THE PARENTS BEFORE THE KIDS ARE REMOVED??  trust me, i am a REALIST... i KNOW there are people who just don't want help or they don't want to change their behavior/lifestyle.  but... being a parent doesn't come naturally to everyone!!  some people really struggle with how to be a successful parent, especially if they didn't have positive roll models. 

then i got back to thinking about this blog... and i DID entitle it "the gonsers one big loud happy blended family" so clearly, on some level, i intended the focus to be on FAMILY!!  and more specifically BLENDED family.  lets face it... more and more families ARE blended.  it may seem easy, but what mike and i learned is:  just because the two adults fall in love, doesn't mean EVERYONE will fall in love!!  blending a family takes time, patience, and work.

the hardest part?  what I feel is the hardest part is... not being able to be with all the kids ALL THE TIME!  more often than not, the family is blended because of divorce (rather than death) so there will be other parents involved.  of course, our case has to be more complicated!!!  :)

we have five other parents...

sabreana and sireana's bio-dad
sabreana and sireana's bio-mom

mollie-  jordan's mom

lexi's bio-mom

brady and brittin's bio-dad

we like to keep things complicated!! 

some parts are simple:  brady, brittin, and lexi live with us 100% of the time with minimal time spent with their other biological parent.  jordan however, lives with her mom, mollie, near chicago.  BAM!!!  not only does she not live with us, she lives almost three hours away!!!  it's heart wrenching!!!  when she's with us for a weekend, it finally feels like our family is whole!!  and when we take her back... ugh... i can't stand it!! 

we are soooo lucky though, because mollie is an excellent co-parent!!  she's so helpful and supportive of us seeing jordan and being with her!  THAT ALONE IS A HUGE PART OF BLENDING A FAMILY!!!  i can't stress this enough... getting along with all the CO-PARENTS IS CRITICAL!!  not just for your own sanity but for the children!!  fighting with anyone doesn't solve anything! 

so, last night... we made that dreaded drive to chicago to take jordan home. we had her for four days to celebrate her SWEET 16!!! we had a great weekend and of course were sad to take her home. but we did get to super surprise her with mollie!!!

jordan was VERY surprised!!

this is a perfect example of how sweet mollie is... she knew how badly we wanted to be there to see jordan get her car, so instead of giving it to her tomorrow on her birthday, she arranged for us to bring her home and give it to her then! win win!! 

so, even though it was the pits taking her back, it was exciting to surprise her and see her so happy!!

happy sweet 16 jordie jordashian!!!  i love you!!! <3 <3 <3 

wow... i just proof-read this and realized i really saw a squirrel and didn't cover the "how do we help parents with their parenting skills?" question... oh well... that will have to be for another day ;)

it's all in the DETAILS!! the WEDDING :)

i can't tell you how many people have told mike, myself, or our parents how great and UNIQUE our wedding was.  obviously i'm happy people enjoyed our wedding!  but the fact that so many people referred to it as "unique" made me really examine the entire production!  and, while i think it was just very "mike and laurie" ... i guess it WAS indeed a different kind of wedding!

what made it different?  well... being married before, and being older now... we realize the wedding IS important, but it's our MARRIAGE that is the real deal!  a wedding lasts a day, a marriage is for a LIFETIME!  so with that in mind, i set out to make every detail of our wedding meaningful!

the INTERNET is a fantastic resource for wedding ideas!  on one site, i read "don't do a unity candle or sand ceremony if all you're trying to do is kill time".  this really hit home!  i knew i didn't want to do any cliched time wasters. 

one of the first things i did was set the "wedding structure".  i got ideas from different websites and put together:

Ceremony Structure

Processional- We all enter- mike chose our processional song "marry me"... we both love it and it worked beautifully

Introduction: 

-         Welcome

-         Presentation of the Couple

-         Thanking of Family & Friends

Reading- Love Story, Address, Sermon… Pastor Time!

The Asking

Vows-  i wrote my own vows.  mike found some on line he liked. 

Ring Exchange    

Family Bouquet Ceremony- this was one of EVERYONE'S favorite parts of the wedding!  i posted lots of pictures below!

Power Point During our power point, we picked a song that was meaningful to us "When We're Together" from the Courageous soundtrack.  Then i picked enough pictures to fill the 3 1/2 minutes... the pictures were of mike and i and of our family over the two years we've all been together.  i promise you, there wasn't a dry eye in the room!

Closing Remarks- a childhood friend of mine, wrote a beautiful poem for mike and i.  this was where she read it.

Declaration of Marriage

Recessional-  again, mike chose the song we left to.  he chose "i can only imagine" which at first seems like a strange choice, but it worked nicely!

Guest Dismissal- we went back and greeted each row

for each of the highlighted areas, i found samples and had mike pick which he liked best.  they are below:

The Welcome we liked- “Welcome everyone.  Mike and Laurie- Today you enter as individuals, but you will leave here as husband and wife, blending your lives, expanding your family, and embarking upon the grandest adventure of human interaction.  The story of your life together is still yours to write.  All those present have come to witness and celebrate your love and commitment this day- eager to be a part of the story not yet told.”

Readings we liked:

“True marriage begins well before the wedding day, and the efforts of marriage continue well beyond the ceremony’s end.  A brief moment in time and the stroke of the pen are all that is required to create the legal bond of marriage, but it takes a lifetime of love, commitment, and compromise to make marriage durable and everlasting.  Today you declare your commitment to each other before family and friends, your yesterdays were the path to this moment, and your journey to a future of togetherness becomes a little clearer with each new day.” 

I Corinthians 13:4-8
Ruth 1:16-17
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
Matthew 19:5-6
Mark 10:6-9

Vows-
“Do you ________ take _________ to be your partner in life, to support and respect her/him in his/her successes and as well as his/her failures, to care for him/her in sickness and in health, to nurture him/her, and to grow with him/her throughout the seasons of your life together?

“I, Mike, take you Laurie to be my wife, my partner in life and my one true love.  I will cherish our marriage and love you more each day than I did the day before.  I will trust you and respect you, laugh with you and cry with you, loving you faithfully through good times and bad, regardless of the obstacles we may face together.  I give you my hand, my heart, and my love, from this day forward for as long as we both shall live”

 my vows... folded and sweaty... and now a treasured keepsake!

Ring Exchange
“I ______ give you _______ this ring as an eternal symbol of my love and commitment to you.  With this ring, I thee wed.”

Family Bouquet Ceremony-
“Mike and Laurie, along with their children have chosen to create a Family Bouquet.  Each member of the family has a chosen a flower, symbolizing them as individuals.  They will combine all their flowers symbolizing the beauty of individuals brought together as a unified family” 

like i said before, we didn't want to do an over-used time filler... if we were going to do some sort of "ceremony", we wanted it to be meaningful.  my original plan was for each of us to chose an artificial flower that they loved.  instead, my step-daughter lexi and i found a group of Gerber daisies (my FAV!) and they had tons of colors... and each one seemed to match a member of our family!  so... we each had a daisy in a single vase behind where we stood. 

one at a time, our children brought us

 their flower

  and gave us a hug.

  there was A LOT of crying!  tears of JOY!

  then mike and i added our flowers

 and created a bouquet... which now sits in our home!

 if you've followed our blog, you know we are a special "blended family"... and every time i look at that bouquet, i'm reminded how EIGHT special people were brought together by God, to make one beautiful family!!

 DECOR-

i did NOT stress out over the decor at the church!  i wanted to keep it simple!  after all, our friends and family were there to see US, not $1000's of flowers and tulle!  the one thing i HAD TO HAVE was this arbor!  i saw one on pinterest and fell in love!  my dad made it ... and it was so popular, we've rented out to other couples!

i collected lots of other "personal touches" from pinterest...

 i came up with the "family tree"... i got the sign from pinterest.  i made the tree because we ARE so unique... our guest could see who belonged to who and all our children's names

 after my dad built the arbor, i wanted to spruce it up abit, so i made this sign out of scrap wood and hung it with twine

other details...

PHOTOGRAPHY-  obviously it's important to find a good photographer... but beyond that... HAVE AN IDEA OF WHAT YOU WANT!!  i knew i didn't want super traditional "church pictures"... there i go again being UNIQUE!!  thankfully, i had a creative and up to date photographer who was familiar with what's currently popular. 

but here was the problem... our church is an old elementary school and i couldn't fathom where we would get any good back drops... me of little faith... we got AMAZING PICS!!

 this is one in a series of nine photos... LOVE!

this was MY idea!  i'm proud of myself! watch out Partridge Family, The Gonser's are in town!!

this was all our photographer!  she was good!

i just wish we weren't squinting from the blinding sun!

 the old brick walls ended up making a GREAT backdrop!

don't be afraid to get dirty!!  and my dress didn't have a mark on it!!

get creative! we're big fans of Tim Tebow, so this just made sense!

work with what you've got!!

we had a playground!!

and it made for great pictures!!

i'm sure i'll have more to blog about later... but if you're planning a wedding, i hope our blog has helped!!!

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Brady... Turning 12!!

in honor of my first born turning TWELVE tomorrow, i dug out an old facebook blog about him... i love you b!!

brady and his niece azria :)

The Story of Brady

I suppose all children want to know how they came into this world.  And my son Brady is no different.  As soon as I wrote “The Story of Brittin”, he made it clear there would also be “The Story of Brady”!  So here it is!

Brady is my first born… special in so many ways.  Before I had Brady, I had a miscarriage.  When I found out I was pregnant the second time, I was nervous but overjoyed!!  Early in my pregnancy my mom read a magazine article about a woman who developed preeclampsia during her pregnancy and died.  That actually wasn’t what I wanted to hear.  However, I also read that only 5% of women develop preeclampsia.  That made me feel better.

I loved being pregnant!  I felt great!  Brady was super active… imagine that!  The only problem that I had was the swelling!  By June I couldn’t wear ANY of my shoes!  Thankfully it was summer and I found a pair of sandals to wear.  July 14th was a Friday and I had a doctor appointment.  I couldn’t wait to show him my feet!  For once they were the normal size!!  And I felt great!  I was pumped!  So you can imagine how SHOCKED I was when I got to the doctor, they took my blood pressure and sent me straight to the hospital!  Totally unexpected!  I’ll never forget, when we got there the parking attendant could see I was very pregnant, though 7 weeks from my due date, and asked me if I’d like a wheelchair.  Why in the world would I want a wheelchair!?  I wasn’t in labor so I declined.  After wandering massive Memorial Hospital for 20 minutes I sincerely wished I’d accepted that wheelchair offer!

 The plan was, monitor my blood pressure.  Give me some medicine to get it back to normal and send me home for some bed rest until delivery.  That’s NOT what happened!  Friday night I missed my aunt and uncles surprise 25th wedding anniversary!  Saturday, I missed my own baby shower!  Sunday I missed my dad’s surprise 50th party I’d been planning!  I like to blame him for this!  When I told my parents my due date:  Sept 1, 2000, my dad’s response was “I’d be cool if you had the baby on my birthday”.  His birthday is July 12th!  That’s actually NOT cool!!  But here I was, day three of being in the hospital, praying I’d be able to go home!  Who would’ve guessed I’d be in the five percent of women who develop preeclampsia!?   By Sunday evening, July 16th, the decision was made, I would not being going home.  Labor would be induced and I would delivery Brady on Monday July 17th, 2000.

Over the weekend, I’d been given steroid shots to help Brady’s lungs develop.  An ultra sound showed he weighted approximately 4 ½ pounds.  All there was left to do was wait.  I was induced… and nothing was happening.  I was given magnesium to prevent me from having a seizure because my blood pressure was so high.  Magnesium makes you very groggy!  That was a blessing because I slept all day!  My family on the other hand waited and waited all day, for some news!  Unfortunately, I didn’t have my doctor and I wasn’t too fond of the doctor I did have.  She came in to check on me around 9:30 a.m. and asked what I’d like her to do.  I told her “take this baby out”!!!  I was then informed “C-sections are major surgery not to be taken lightly.  You’ll have to wait for the induction to work and deliver him”.  My question, “Then why did you ask me what I want if I can’t even have it!?”.  I showed her!!  By five p.m., still no baby and I was only at 1 cm!  So ha!  The doctor came in, told me, “I’m going to run home, have dinner, change clothes and I’ll be back to do the C-section”.  WHAT??  You’re doing what??  Get this baby out now!  She wasn’t kidding.  She took her sweet time!  But at 6:37 my precious Brady was born!  A plump 3 lb. 2 oz!!

I know brady thinks there is a special relationship between father and son.  No doubt there is… I know how he feels about his Big Daddy.  But there is no other relationship like that of mother and son.  I found that out that July in 2000.  The second I laid eyes on him, I was hooked!  To this day 12 years later, I still feel like I have an extra special relationship with Brady.  Having him in my life got me through some really tough times.  I have a truck load of regrets when it comes to mistakes I’ve made with him.  And brady will admit he’s had some serious resentment toward me.  Thanks to Big Daddy, brady and I have worked through a lot of this.  Brady’s learned to forgive me for the past and I’ve learned to forgive myself.

I also, dug this other blog out… and thought I’d share it as well in honor of brady!

                Inspiration from an 11 year old

After losing his first 2 wrestling matches and having to sit out a couple of times, our son Brady got to try again last night.  It was going to be my first time watching him and I was quite honestly prepared for the worst.  Oh ME of little faith… Brady did AWESOME!  His match lasted just over 2 minutes and in the end, not only did BRADY WIN, but he PINNED his opponent!

On the way home, Mike asked Brady “what was that?  That was like a totally different kid!!”  and here’s Brady’s answer:    “the coach came and told me I was going to wrestle.  He said he wanted me to take 5 minutes and think about what I was going to do.  All I could think about was I’M TIRED OF LOSING!  And at the end… when the ref lifted MY arm instead of the other guy’s, THAT WAS AWESOME… WAY BETTER!!”

Now… if that’s not FAITH and the POWER OF POSITIVE THINKING, I don’t know what is!

Thank you B!!!  You are an AMAZING son!!  I couldn’t ask for more!  You make me so proud!  You’re smart.  You’re athletic.  You are sensitive and caring.  But probably my favorite thing about you is your BOLDNESS and Zest for Life!  There is nothing you’re afraid to try… no one you’re afraid to talk to!!  You set such a wonderful example to so many people!!  I love you B!!!

what is God trying to tell me??

i've been thinking about this blog for awhile now.  and it's so complicated, i don't even know where to start.  so i suppose some background information is where to begin...

OUR KIDS...

if you read my earlier blogs, you know i was a foster parent.  i only fostered one sibling group because i ended up adopting them.  in the back of my mind, i always wondered what would have happened if i'd fostered more children...

i had my oldest biological child... brady, when i was 23.  he was seven weeks premature, but otherwise completely healthy. at 26 i lost my second biological child... brenna... she was stillborn.  when i was 27, i had my daughter brittin.  brittin was 11 weeks early and had multiple health issues because of her prematurity.  i knew at the time of her delivery, i was done having children! 

so, by 27 years old, i had four children... two adopted and two biological. 

by the time my husband mike was 23, he had two daughters, jordan and alexis.  at 23, he decided he was done too...

fast forward to 2010... mike and i meet and between the two of us, we have six children!  so why in God's name am i completely overwhelmed with this URGE to "have a kid"!?!?!  ok... read those words carefully... i said "have a kid" not "give birth to a baby"!!  in no way shape or form do i desire in my heart to birth any more kids!!  but i have been so overcome with this urge lately! 

FOSTERING...
i wish i had fancy statistics, i tried to google it... i couldn't find it... but i know there are hundreds of children in foster cared in elkhart county, let alone our entire state.  i've wondered... am i REALLY done fostering?  did i really accomplish everything God wanted me to in this area? 

MISSIONARIES...
i've never been particularly interested in the mission field.  of course i've always supported the missionaries who would come to speak at church... but i definitely had no desire to go on a mission trip.  now, i don't know if my change of heart is because we now attend a church that is very mission focused... or if God just has some big plan for me... but i am completely and totally fixated on our church's next mission trip.  maybe part of my desire is because the trip relates to something near and dear to my heart... orphans.  our family WILL be going to mexico with our church to serve with Andrew & Anna Conrad!!  i am so completely excited!  i'm also overwhelmed with the feeling that God is really going to do a work on our family there... i don't know what... but he's doing something....

  ************************************************************************************
AM I ABSOLUTELY CRAZY???

my daughter sireana and i keep telling mike that we need to expand our family... that we need an african american son... and at first, i was kind of teasing him... but as the days go by, i find myself longing more for another child.  then i think to myself, "laurie, you are CRAZY!!"  

but i feel like God is really working on me... i don't know for what... but i got an email this week entitled "adoption is a reflection of God's love"... then the "our daily bread" for yesterday was about opening up our homes!

so i decided to share my feelings with the one person on earth who isnt afraid to tell me the truth... if i AM crazy, my dad will tell me!!  so over lunch last week, i told my dad how i was feeling... and asked if he'd ever felt like God was working on something in his life that he didn't understand... that's when dad told me this story:

"it was my 12th birthday and i was lying in the hospital after being hit by a car.  my leg was badly broken... i was all torn up.  i remember asking God 'why?  why do i have to be here on my 12th birthday?!  i didn't do anything wrong!!'  i never got an answer.  six years later, i was watching tv as they held a national raffle to see what service men would be sent to the front lines in Vietnam.  on the 12th draw, they pulled MY birthday, July 12th...  but at that moment, i knew i wouldn't be going because of my 12th birthday and the broken leg... the military wouldn't accept me because of my lasting injury.  it was right then, i knew God, in his own time had answered my question... i now knew why i'd been in the hospital on that 12th birthday... God had other plans for me... so yes laurie, i know exactly how you feel"

after that stunning story... one i'd never heard in my 35 years... i knew for sure my dad didn't think i'm crazy!  and i knew for sure, God does have some sort of plan for me... i don't know what, but i think he has something in store for us in mexico

i just don't think i'm done... i think God has more for me to do...

well, if you read all that... thanks!!  i really needed to get that off my chest!!

the WEDDING ARBOR!!!

as if my last post didn't demonstrate my obsession with pinterest ... check this out!!!

i was definitely not "bridezilla" but i certainly spent A LOT of time planning our wedding... down to every little detail!!  one of which was an Arbor.  i absolutely fell in love with a branch arbor i found on pinterest.  i had to have one!  so... i printed the picture... with absolutely NO instructions... handed it to my dad... and VOILA!!!

WOW!!  totally horrible picture!  i WILL post better!! 

so... if you live in Northern Indiana, Southern Michigan... we are RENTING the Wedding Arbor so other happy couples can enjoy it!!  The flowers are NOT attached... the sign is hung by twine... i also make the custom signs. 

if you want an arbor you can keep forever... we will build CUSTOM WEDDING ARBORS!!! 

for more information, please email us at:  thegonsers@gmail.com



THE FARM TABLE!!!

Well... here i sit at our BRAND NEW FARM TABLE!!

i was joking with mike the other night... i said "every man in america must HATE pinterest!"  he quipped back with "my buddies are gonna call to ask if i watched ND game and i'm gonna say 'no, i was too busy doing pinterest projects with my wife!!' "  deep down, i know he loves it!

so... how did we get to this FARM TABLE?  well... mike and i have been living in our home for the past 2 years with three of our children- lexi, brady, and brittin.  that makes FIVE of us!  this past april, my daughter sireana and granddaughter azria moved in with us!!  this makes for a very happy laurie!  however, our table for SIX did not accommodate our now family of SEVEN!  so the mission began!  get a table that sits EIGHT!! 

i had a vision... fueled by my obsession with pinterest!!  a FARM TABLE!!!   i NEEDED one!!  i wanted it to look distressed... old... like the one on "The Walton's"!!  they were a happy family!! 

so... i did lots of internet searching... found several tables we liked... printed lots of plans/directions... sent mike to Lowe's for wood... and after a mere 8 hours... mike and my father-in-law had whipped up this:  okay.... that didn't go as planned!!!!  i really wanted the picture BELOW!!!  sooo.... look up!!

HOW did we do it??  i'm hoping mike will be a sweetie and help me blog some specifics on how this massive 84" baby was made... but i can give a few details!!

 this is the FINISHED, in the kitchen product!!!

 this is a close up of the FINISHED "distressing"

  this is a close up of the "painted" table

  this is the table after the "watered down wash"

  table making... a family project!  our son brady

  mike LOOKS confused! 

  this is the raw tabletop in the workshop

  bench in the workshop

she's made out of pine... she is 84" long... we have three chairs on one side and one at each end.  mike also made a 72" bench that seats three to four people.  he designed the bench to be able to slide under the table while we aren't using it... i love him for that!! 

how we got the "old worn" look... annie sloan chalk paint!  it's a miracle!!  the legs are painted in "old white" and the tops are painted in "coco".  we did a watered down wash because our wood was "raw"... then painted the table... then distressed the table using sandpaper... then we dark waxed the table and bench twice.  we did a final clear wax for super protection. 

WHAT IF YOU WANT A GONSER MADE FARM TABLE and you don't have a super handy husband or the desire to make one???? if you live in Indiana, Michigan, Ohio, or Illinois,  you're in luck!!!  mike WILL build custom farm tables!!  if you are interested in more information, please email us at:  thegonsers@gmail.com

who am i?

again, i was thinking about the direction for this blog and i came up with 3 main areas i want to cover

1.  Blended Family-
mike and i have a blended family... and it is hard work!  but we make it work... and we do it pretty darn well!  so i would like to touch on that...

2.  Foster Parent-
as i mentioned in an earlier blog... i did do foster care and adopted my foster daughters... it seems like a life time ago... and i was a different person then... but i think i'd like to talk about that...

3.  Working Mom Making It Work At Home-
ok... THIS one is super important to me!!!  i can not tell you how many blogs i read... specifically about home projects and decorating... and i'm looking at the pictures they post... and all i can think is "REALLY!!!???  Your house REALLY looks like that on a daily basis?!?"  well my house doesn't!!!  and sometimes, these blogs start to give me a complex!!  but then i refocus and remember, i am a working mom and fiercely proud of it!  would i like to be a stay at home mom?  OF COURSE!!  but we have chosen a lifestyle and path for our family that means i need to work... and i'm ok with that!  i still want my house to look like it could be in Better Homes & Gardens!  i still want to do all the stuff stay at home mommies do... so i want to show how i make it work (or how i don't sometimes!)



ok... that's it for now :)

ROAD TRIP!!!

one of the other reasons i wanted to do this blog is to document my completely random, often spontaneous and always quirky adventures... plus... i'll be sharing with you all the "projects" i'm always working on!  i have a love for anything and everything crafty!  therefore, pinterest... oh sweet pinterest... how you suck me in and inspire me all at the same time... has become my newest addiction!!! 

today, i'm on a mission to buy Annie Sloan paint.  why?  cause i keep hearing how awesome it is!!  and because i have the BESTEST husband in the world... he's building me a giant farm table tomorrow!!!  clearly, Annie Sloan paint and wax is what i need to paint it and of course, only TWO, yes TWO places in all of indiana sell it!!  one is in peru and one is... somewhere i've never heard of even farther than peru... sooo, the kids and i are headed to peru in a little bit!!  when i told them my plan the other day, lex says to me "we're driving to south america to buy paint?!?"  PRICELESS!! 

on our way, we will be looking for garage sales... flea markets... and anything else quirky that catches our eyes!!  hopefully i'll remember to document all our fun by taking pictures, but regardless, i will for sure share all the details of our adventure to peru!! 

how do you make it work?

i've been thinking alot about what direction i want to take this blog.  clearly, it needs to be humorous because THATS who i am!  and i want to be inspirational as well.  and really, the stuff that happens in our lives is so funny sometimes, i just want to share it with people! 

today, i thought i'd continue with the "from the beginning" and "how we make it work".  clearly, when you have 6 kids, there's A LOT to deal with! 
maybe i'll start with how mike and i met... plain and simple- on the internet.  now at first i was ... embarrassed to admit that, but what's better, "i met him at a bar"?  i was a busy single mom... where was i going to met single men?  so i tried an on-line dating site.  after what seemed like endless jerks, weirdos, and "not for me" guys, i was DONE!!  i really didn't want to date anymore!  i was content being single and raising my kids.  but.... i had been talking to this guy named mike... i wasn't sure about him... he didn't seem to fit my "criteria", but i had agreed to meet for a drink and i decided to follow through.  i was sure he'd be a loser and then i was REALLY done dating...  

little did i know, God had other plans for me :) 

before mike and i could even meet for dinner, he did some facebook stalking, put two and two together and realized i was the ex-wife of his childhood friend.  SMALL WORLD.  that actually worked out to mike's advantage tho... i remember stories from my ex-husband about his friend "mike" and they were great!  so... we go to dinner... mike was a shy and quiet, yet straight forward kind of guy.  i liked that.  he laid it on the line for me:  he was unemployed, had no car, he and his daughter lexi lived with his parents, and his oldest daughter jordan lived in chicago with her mom.  ok... that was alot to digest:  unemployed, no home, no car, 2 baby mamas.  clearly what i'm looking for.  but there was something about him.  i can't even describe it... it was an honesty... a sincerity... and i could just feel his tender spirit... that was it... i was hooked...  our first date was on a monday... by friday, i knew i would spend the rest of my life with this man.

ok, i know you're wondering how i could make such a crazy decision.  well, my situation didn't look much better on paper!  i had divorced my SECOND husband six months earlier... i lost my house in the divorce so i was renting a house from my parents... my yukon had been repossessed so i was driving a 1999 taurus that my aunts/uncle & mom were nice enough to give me when my grandpa went to heaven.  i DID have a good job (bonus!!)...  so both of us were clearly coming into this with "baggage"

i feel like taking you through the entire two and a half years of our relationship would be tedious... so i'll skip to the chase... mike and i make a GREAT team!  in the 2+ years we've been together:  we stayed in my house and have been redecorating it and making it our own... we've upgraded cars twice- and mike's is completely paid off... mike got an awesome job ~ project manager of major accounts at a plastics company ~ exactly what he loves ... i'm still at my job and got a 20% raise!  We have been blessed beyond belief! 

why am i sharing all this "dirt"... well, i really want people to feel inspired!  when you look at our life, it's very ideal!  we love each other... we have good jobs... we have a beautiful home... we have outstanding children...  but WE HAVE BEEN TO THE BOTTOM!!  we know what it's like to lose everything... and we know what it's like to make difficult but good decisions to crawl back out on top.  i'm sincerely hoping someone reading this will be inspired.  be inspired to make changes... trust in God... work hard...

i wanted to talk about how we "blended" our families and make it work, but clearly i didnt get to that... so i guess that will be for another time!

who are we?!?!?!

i started to blog about our kids, but then i thought, WHOA!  Wait a second, maybe we should start from the beginning!!  who are we?  i want this blog to be more about US than just ME... so i should define who WE are!

we= mike and laurie... and with our children and fur babies, we make up "the gonser's blended family".  that might seem unimpressive (is that a word?) to you, but if you see the bigger picture, you understand why OUR blended family is alittle special!

THAT ^^^^^ is us!  Cute right?!  Confused yet?  :)  most people are!  clearly, mike and i are the two getting married!  and the other six are our children!  yes, even the two adults! 

our favorite question is "HOW OLD ARE YOU?"  i've been enjoying that question for 12 years now!  my favorite answer is "i look GREAT for my age don't i?!?" 

alright, i'll explain!  i wish i could draw on here... like with arrows and stuff like they do on monday night football!  THAT would be cool!!  but since i can't...  starting from the TOP... in the black is Lexi.  next down is sireana.  hot pink one shoulder dress is sabreana.  little man is brady.  pink strapless is jordan.  princess front and center is brittin. 

now for the WHO and HOW!!

who belongs to who?
lexi- mike
sireana- me
sabreana- me
brady- me
jordan- mike
brittin- me

how??

clearly, how mike got his children isn't a mystery ;)
me on the other hand... i'm 35... i have a 27 year old and 26 year old... i certainly didn't birth them!  at the ripe old age of 20, i read a book called "A Child Called It" and it's sequel "Lost Boy" after which i was determined to become a foster parent... and i DID!  my first and only foster children were Sabreana and Sireana.  i adopted them two years after they moved in.  brady and brittin... i had the old fashioned way! 

obviously, there's so much more to this story... grand kids, a son-in-law, two precious fur babies... but there will be time for that and many more blogs to come! 

Here I go!

i keep tripping up on all these amazing blogs on pinterest and it just makes me need my own!!  i tried this once before, and i believe my children would describe it as an "epic fail".  so i'm going to try again!  i'm not sure i'm doing it right tho... i want it to be cool, and have different sections to where you can click and see "all about us" or "look at house messy our house is" or "stalk us because i've posted way too many pictures leading you to where we live"... you get the picture.  so if anyone reading this knows how to do that... help a sister out!!!

mike, my super fantastic husband has asked me a couple of times why i don't write a book.  i've in turn explained, i can't get my thoughts organized enough!  and as i sit here to blog, i find myself having the same problem!  i really do have alot to say, i just don't know where to start!!  so i guess, there will just be a lot of blogging in my future to get it all out!